Local View: Caribbean cruise the ultimate travel adventure — oh, really (2024)

Believe the government or the tour operator?

This from officials in Haiti: “Kidnapping is widespread, and victims regularly include U.S. citizens. Kidnappers may use sophisticated planning or take advantage of unplanned opportunities, and even convoys have been attacked. Violent crime, often involving the use of firearms, such as armed robbery, carjackings, and kidnappings for ransom that include U.S. citizens are common.”

But this from a tour operator for a cruise to Labadee, Haiti: “Beachside meets mountainside on the shores of Labadee, private destination on Haiti’s northern coast. Here you’ll find pristine sands, coral reefs, and jungle-covered hilltops nestling lagoon-like bays. There’s no shortage of places to relax and recharge across five stretches of beach. Or dial up the thrills on an active adventure, like a half-mile-long zipline ride over the ocean. And fascinating culture, history, and the natural beauty of Haiti’s spectacular coasts wait to be discovered around every corner. Escape to the Western Caribbean for a wilder way to experience paradise.”

Huh?

I am partial to the real Caribbean, for I traveled to all the islands for decades selling vegetable oil, grains, and glamorous tallow (OK, slaughterhouse fat trimmings), the chief ingredient for soap. And I spent a lot of time seeing that a soybean-processing plant was built in Jamaica. And I was also responsible for a 3,000-ton tanker, the Anna K, which sailed throughout the Caribbean delivering a variety of liquid cargoes (like glamourous caustic soda). And Montego Bay doesn’t sound that glamorous when you consider the name is believed to have originated as a corruption of the Spanish word manteca ("lard"), allegedly because during the Spanish occupation it was the port where lard and beef were exported.

I dealt with all the players from Francois Duvalier and his son Baby Doc in Haiti to my lawyer in Santo Domingo whose nickname was El Cuchillo (“the knife”). I became close friends with Jamaican writer Morris Cargill who was editor of many James Bond (“shaken, not stirred”) novels by Ian Fleming — and yep, a distant relative of our own Minnesota Cargills.

The Caribbean Islands are such a wonderful mélange of cultures and languages and business practices, which cruise ships miss. Thus, when someone says they went on a Caribbean cruise and now knows everything about that part of the world, it infuriates me. I mean, how can you learn anything by being on shore for five to nine hours, which is the standard-length port of call, with a morning arrival and late-afternoon departure. You have time to visit the port shops selling “handicrafts” from the Philippines and China. Cruise vacations are configured to mostly please guests who consider the ship itself to be the "main thing.”

And yet, cruise ships are getting even larger. Royal Caribbean just launched the Icon of the Seas. Travel Advisor noted: “The ship is five times the size of the Titanic, can take 7,000 passengers, boasting twenty decks, eight ‘neighborhoods,’ a miniature Central Park — and a veritable army of online haters. Sailing on what is a floating city can be overwhelming and likely won't feel intimate. On large ships with poor layouts, lines for everything from the buffet to the theater can be long, and good luck finding a deck chair by the pool.”

But 30 million people went on cruises in 2023. All the Caribbean islands are suffering from “overtourism.”

But I did take the most wonderful Caribbean cruise on the Radisson Diamond (now China Star). Yes, it once belonged to the same company as Radisson Harbor View. The Diamond was a one-of-a-kind catamaran that took 330 passengers and didn’t make you seasick. And on the sailing, I was booked on a corporate cruise that spent nights on certain ports. French-speaking St. Barts was my favorite, and the State Department will never issue a travel warning for it. Bon voyage!

John Freivalds of Wayzata, Minnesota, is the author of six books, is the honorary consul of Latvia in Minnesota, and is a regular contributor to the News Tribune Opinion page. His website is jfamarkets.com.

See Also

Are there any Caribbean islands you don't need a passport for? - Employment Security Commission